Where Women Are Genetically Superior!!

All humans are not equal. They are not supposed to be equal regardless of what proclamation of equality might say. Each of us is different beyond that apparent similarity in shape we possess. And difference lies deep within and has been made subtle over generations.

“I searched for it fervently and my look-out was exhaustive. After a few minutes, I was vanquished and I declared May Day. She came scuttling, scoured through the pillows, mystically conjured the keys that remained imperceptible to me out of puff, placed it on my hands rather forcefully, but only after rendering the look.”

So what do we learn from all this? Girls always produce a look after doing a favour, Yeah, true but apart from that. Well, it must be slightly appalling that what had been an arduous yet futile conquest for me was a matter of seconds for her. So, what to infer? Do I have some sort of biological imparity that impedes my searching ability such poor eyesight? Or is there some indiscernible difference in the way she and I search for things? Is this a part of some grave fair sex conspiracy? Maybe she had the keys on her all the while and didn't inform me when I was foraging and eventually produced it from the same spot I had been looking out to make me feel worthless by that undermining look? Vicious, isn't it!!

How enticing the last option may appear to you all fellow men, it is not true (at least not entirely). And before your horses of imagination run astray, I must aver that it is genetic. Yes! Yes! I know “it’s genetic” has become a fancy explanation for all. Why are criminals violent? Can’t do anything, it is genetic. Why are Asian good at maths? It is genetic. Why do blacks have long d***s? You know…. it’s genetic. Why can’t your partner find keys? Umm..ah.. wait..wait..It is genetic. 

So here I should restate it one again: Women are genetically superior to male (at finding lost keys). If I had simply stated what is written before the parenthesis, feminist would have been delighted beyond measure: ”Yeah! We have always been aware of it.” A different phrase in parenthesis might have appeased them as well but, now, well, who craves to be genetically superior at finding keys.  All we want is fast brains (and long _______). But, these do have certain implications which do have significance (I mean greater significance than key finding ability) in the modern world. These show we are different, Men and Women, at more subtle levels. But before discussing that, let me tell you a story: The Story of advent of Key-Finders.

Once upon a time, there lived homo-sapiens. These creatures were much primitive and the environment they lived in was more challenging. The homo-sapiens were of two types: X-gals and Y-bros. The world they lived in had two primary tasks for survival, both equally important: gathering of fruits and water and hunting of prey. The X-gals and Y-bros decided to partner up and divide the work where X-gals became the gatherers and Y-bros became hunters. Hunting involved working in uncertain environment, good sense of direction and special orientation and a single-minded approach. Gathering required acquaintance with environment, good memory, better remembrance of landmarks and locations. In addition to these, due to a previous agreement X-gals also had to look after young ones (who were very young to be taken in uncertain environments). So, they became methodical and began to multi-task efficiently dividing their attention among various works.

Every group wanted to ensure survival.  So there was a demand for Y-bros who could hunt well and X-gals who could multi-task. Over a chronological period, natural selection came into play and only those X-gals and Y-bros were selected whose antecedents suited the division of labour. With fleeting generations, learning accrued and traits ameliorated but then the challenges became obsolete. And, now we have proved that, in fact X-gals possess better OLM and Y-bros are better at 3DMR (3-dimensional mental rotations).

Master Multi-tasker

What do results of such experiments indicate? Women are actually good at finding lost objects. Moreover, they are more methodical and structured in their approach and perform better in certain environments. So, women excel at jobs that necessitate methodical approach. They can prove to be a better administrator in peaceful interludes. They are good physicians, COOs, accountants. They are better at maintaining records. They can perform well as a CEO of an established enterprise but they deliver poor results in markedly uncertain situations such as driving, stock trading, and entrepreneurship. Contrastingly, males are guileless Spartans of uncertainty.  

A common stereotype

However, if your behaviour seems aberrant from the aforementioned, you needn't bother. Statistically, men are inferior in certain environment does not mean all men are necessarily inferior in certain environment or vice-versa. Every generation has fair set of weirdos, your great-great grandfather was one and look he did get a chick (Cheer up all weirdos!!). Being an anomaly, doesn't always mean you are disadvantaged. Furthermore, there was one more finding of these experiments. Male performed exceptionally poor when they were not made aware of the motive of the experiment in the beginning. But when apprised in advance, the gap between the two genders significantly abated suggesting that any genetic advantage has a certain limit beyond which a man (or woman) on his/her own.  We are like urns slightly filled with memoirs of past passed down to us as inheritance from our forefathers and remainder of that urn has to be filled by you. Yours genes decide how you can be, but it is you who decide how you shall be. 

Apropos of nothing, Happy Promise Day!!!